Unhappy Halloween

Lopez’s baby’s mom blocked us from receiving messages we send her regarding his son yesterday.I have decided to publically plead to her in hopes that she reads this and has a change of heart! 

Dearest Baby Lopez’s Mom,

We appreciate the fact that you may be very angry right now, but we were hoping you might find it in your heart to allow Junior to take his son out with us trick or treating tonight? We will make sure he stays warm & bundled.We even had a little hat made for him to keep his little ears toasty! We can pick him up and drop him off or we can give you gas money.We will also send him home with diapers and wipes for a week or two and anything else you may need for baby.Thank you for considering, as you haven’t allowed Lopez to see his son since he has began legally pursuing custody (over a month) and he really misses him!
Yours Truly, Baby Lopez’s Dad and family


Raging River

His demeanor is valor worthy, as I read the pain on his face from time to time. 
Lopez recently experienced the first process of custody by means of an informative class to be followed by a mediation with a “mediator”- (as in what the what are her credentials, because last time I checked, bullying a 17 year old may or may not have consequences) and of course his baby’s mother was there too, face to face. The mediator felt perplexed enough to ask him why he wouldn’t just be grateful and take weekends and holidays once in awhile, because he is a “father” and that’s what he should expect… Unfortunately, we will be going to trial with only the best custody attorney! Unfortunate because next available trial isn’t until February 2016.

As proud as I am that he stood his ground, I wish he would have spoken his true feelings. He worries every day for his child’s well being while his baby is in his mother’s care. Reasons for this are as follows:
1.  She has previously been found guilty of injury to her first child whom she no longer has custody of. (Public Record)
2.  She has had or currently has a warrant issued for her arrest. (Public Record)
3.  She has been unable to meet his child’s basic needs.
4.  She was 23 years old when he was only 16 when his baby was conceived.

Because of  reason #4, we have become his baby boy’s advocate as Lopez is 18 now, with his baby boy’s half sibling on the way, which invests us even more.

Dear Lopez, We promise to fight for your rights as a father and the welfare of your child. We wil never back down, ever! Try not to be sad when her spite prevents you from the missed milestones that are evident and come to fruition, every single day. Your good intentions will prevail.

“The tears from your past left a raging river to cross.The present swim is too cold, don’t be tempted by loss.The bridge you built is admirable, but less than lean. Just simply take my hand and cross with me” ~AM

A Blood Sucking Vampire For Halloween

Oh my gosh this has been a busy week so far. Between parties and costume needs for all my kids… honestly,I don’t even like Halloween that much!

Kylie had her PICC line placed today. The home health nurse declared her veins officially “drained” after four attempts to place a PIV yesterday. Maybe she should be a vampire for Halloween. The procedure to place it wasn’t that invasive. The only risk was radiation exposure which is low as today marks the milestone of being officially out of the first trimester! 
On top of all that, my oldest 19 year old daughter, Allison is moving back home today. I am so excited to have her home for the holidays and here for the birth of her first  niece or nephew! After a decent year running a retail space for her store, Bonnie’s Boutique, Allison has found it more cost effective to return to online & farmer’s market sales only. Leaving us a bit sad as well as hopeful for the future.
The nursery is coming together as I  finally finished my rehab project!
Dresser to Changing Station:

I upholstered the inside walls with black minky fabric.

The Love Is Where The Line Is

It actually feels like forever since I have shared with you, my beloved readers!

As the days go by and her belly swells, I feel biblical as if only I knew what I know now… I understand that she still needs me, but she is going to be o.k.
Again I am faced with a crossroads that may lead to crossing that line or not even remotelybut getting very close to meeting it. I would hate to be that girl that got so close, but chose the wrong dang road!
What I am trying to say is that being a person that has a tendency to be codependent, I am more likely to choose THE WRONG ROAD! It’s a daily struggle to find faith in the right road.
Guidelines in the form of questions I have learned so far…
1. If the road taken has challenges, am I willing to struggle?
2. If the road taken hurts others, does it make me genuinely sad?
3. When I get to my destination, will I be so satisfied that I will not want anything more?
After the learned applied, I am happy to report that everyone is peaceful & home in my heart of hearts once again! The line simply got lost in my love for them this time!

My Whole Heart

Dearest Birth Mother, I wanted to thank you. If it weren’t for you I wouldn’t love them as much as I do, I wouldn’t ever give them compassion as much as my own, I wouldn’t ever be delighted in their daily conversations that I am privileged to hear, I wouldn’t be so thrilled to have everyone else gone this weekend right now right this second with them & just them… these two, that I love and happen to be the dead center of my universe this entire weekend! Junior & Aliyah, I love you two… So, so much!& thank you So much birth mother for giving them to me! They are my greatest blessing, & again thank you for them!

Today’s Accomplishments

“The only way to accomplish anything in this life is to live and breathe it every single day”~AM
Twice per year since Kylie and her brother were babies themselves, we have driven to Boise for the metabolic clinic. A specialist would fly in from Portland for a complete checkup for the two of them. Yesterday was the first appointment in years that the metabolic team actually gave us compliments for managing their blood values so well in the past few months.

Kylie knew when she got pregnant that it would take hard work and daily perseverence to keep her phenylanine levels low enough to have a healthy baby. It has been so hard and without the placement of the feeding tube, I am not 
sure how it could’ve been accomplished. It has been accomplished for today, at least. We probably won’t be doing any kind of celebrating because we still have a long road ahead. It’s just nice to celebrate the milestones today and once in awhile along the way!

  Baby Lopez is the size of a “lime”

Codependent Excess

I am so annoyed with the excess in my life right now. I am not sure if it’s stuff as in things or if it’s just a whole bunch of unfinished business. As a codependent person, I tend to pile on a lot as an excuse to just not deal. This makes me irritable and less understanding toward others around me. I am going to make a plan to get a hold on that today, before it starts affecting the ones I love.

We are scheduled for a visit to the Metabolic Clinic today and after much nagging on my part, I sincerely hope that Kylie has her diet journal filled out completely. It’s important for her medical team to be able to see what her protein intake amounts are to see how it reflects her phenylanine blood levels. 
Her daily IV infusions at home are making a big difference in Kylie’s day. Despite the occasional headache, her nausea and vomiting have greatly decreased!